I wanna touch the sky, I wanna fly so high.

When I think about leaving this job to go to Sweden, I feel like this. My heart just sinks. I've loved working for this place and with these people. At the same time, I'm so excited to go overseas. At least I know I'll have my job when I return.

I'm carving a little life for myself. I've been long distance walking by day, and working by night. I'm eating right... and I'm spoiling myself a little as well. I'm thinking of new music to listen to and new activities to be occupied with. I'm teaching myself to enjoy the pleasure of my own company. As one best friend put it, turning it from loneliness to aloneness. I can get so clingy when it comes to other people and depending on them to make me happy - which isn't healthy for me. Sometimes I just need to take a step back. Re-evaluate, rebuild, reform, rethink.

I'm coming to terms with terrible things that have happened - that are not my fault, I've realised - and accepted that I'm just not the person I was. I deserve so much better and I'm not settling for less just because I'm craving company. I just can't do that to myself without crumpling into a ball and feeling totally useless. And obviously feeling that way is not ideal. Not when I have such a social job and so much ahead of me. I deserve the right to look out for myself - and hey, I've been doing it for so long anyway. What's different?

Hope you are well. Christmas is nearly upon us...

Long overdue Coldplay update.

So I realise this is something like, four days late. Whoops.

Okay. So Etihad itself were good sports about the event. We got the glowing wristbands after entering the venue and I had fangirled and bought this t-shirt at a merch branch. And we cloaked.

We were about this much away from the stage.

The Pierces started the opening sets. I knew these ladies and it was their first time in Australia. Everyone sung along to 'Secret'. The Temper Trap started their set with 'it's good to be home', before launching into their incredible set. I think I'll be buying their albums quite soon.

We were then left to wait for how long, maybe 45 minutes, until it had gotten completely dark. 

Coldplay launched straight into it with their Back to the Future theme (I am such a fangirl) before Mylo Xyloto and Hurts Like Heaven. Complete with pyrotechnics, lasers, fireworks. In My Place followed next, with confetti cannons going off all around and everyone Area Standing had their hands to the sky as it twirled with confetti.

Some bouncy balls came next with Lovers In Japan. 

And the light show was amazing to be amongst. 

...my wristband didn't work during the show, which was quite disappointing. But I didn't let that stop me appreciating that I was THERE.

My companion Kat was a great choice; she was an experienced mosher and she'd maneuvered us through the crowd to almost be at the front of Area Standing B. She was such a pleasure. Thank you.

They snuck up the back and did a B stage, with Speed of Sound. Then came back up to finish with three more songs, concluding with more fireworks with Every Teardrop Is A Waterfall.

I saw Chris Martin a couple of times in person, but it was mostly via screen. I'm too short for mosh.

Clips: 

• Pre-show vlog.
• In My Place (confetti and balls, not my clip)
• Paradise Xylobands from Area Standing B
• Don't Let It Break Your Heart
• Coldplay fireworks finale

Ed Sheeran!

So he's quite a talented fellow. It's something you can only fully realise when you see him live. He's always operating those loop pedals; he showed us how they worked and how they were utilised. He also made great use of the venue's acoustics (Thebarton Theatre) and knew how to work the crowd.

Opening act Georgi Kay was also a great experience.

Some clips for you:

• Give Me Love (climax)
• Grade 8
• Kiss Me (complete)
• My summary of the day.

Also I went to Adelaide for this. Never been. It's interesting.

Maybe I fell in love when you woke me up ♥

Ed Sheeran in a few weeks. I've been listening to + in preparation. And his cover of Wonderwall is enough to make anybody fall in love.

I've also started a blog for a class, Crazy Academic Waitress. If you would like to see my academic musings on globalisation, feel free.

I've also decided not to go to the True Blood con. Once I find somebody to benefit from my change in decision, things should be fine. Hopefully.

Waiting on people has ruined me - I think I've lost faith in humanity. The regulars are fine, they've gotten to see me for the person that I am. It's just the people that expect to be waited on as though they were royalty. Yes, ordering six coffees at the one time and expecting them to arrive in a timely fashion when there's so much other crap going on around you... of course the world doesn't centre around you!

Needless to say, I was nodding as I read this blog post quite emphatically; I think I got whiplash.

Sometimes it's all too much and I forget what it's like to feel - other than empty and broken, I mean. Sometimes there's that wonderful reminder. Music's always been something that's helped me feel; it's always been there for me. Not that I know too much about it, but it's a more emotional connection than a technical one. I'm a very up and down person. Emotional extremes.

Animation class.